Dating Nonsense: Tales Of Dating In Midtown

By Christina Birdsall, Contributor

My conversations with Jay pretty much begin the same way: “Hiiiii.” To which he responds, “Yooooo.” This leads into the regular chatter.

“How is your girlfriend?” I ask, fully knowing his response, which varies anywhere from “amazing” to “spectacular.” If g-chats allowed a musical number in place of that happy face emoticon, I’m fairly certain that would be his preference.

Now this is the hard part of having a platonic relationship with a guy. It gets even stickier when said guy may have taken you to a couple dinners before you both realized that there is a reason why the two of you never tried this dating thing before. The trick is not to seem bitter or put off by his dating success. And I’m not, well, not really. His girlfriend is gorgeous and undeniably likeable due to the fact she is the sweetest girl – almost to the point of annoyance. This chick would probably help me change a tire on the side of the road if I asked. Even though we would both inevitably end up calling AAA or better yet, Jay.

I tell him I’m like 92 percent happy and 8 percent irritated that he has hit the dating jackpot with this girl. Any single person who has a friend lucky in love is an out-and-out liar if they don’t have this scale to measure their happiness for their friend. Just like the scales of justice, it can be tipped more to one side or the other depending on the person in question. For example, what about an ex who you are “so over?” You would be 43 percent stoked and 77 percent bitter beer face. Your younger sister gets engaged to Mr. Perfect? A woman would probably be 88 percent genuinely happy and well, a dude would be 101 percent happy if his future bro-in-law has season tickets to one of those games with a ball.

Jay sees my dilemma in trying to figure out what the hell is wrong with the male species as a whole, and why I can’t seem to find that winning lotto ticket of man. I mean, who are we kidding? Thank god for my platonic male friends like Jay, or I would never have anyone to do the heavy lifting each time I move.

I never seem to come to any particular conclusion when discussing my dating concerns with Jay. And he never seems to provide any kind of solution. So for now, I’ve decided that I should share my vast experience with the world and more specifically, Sacramento. This I promise to you – and man I hope there is more than one of you out there – I promise to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I will not only share my experiences, but those of my friends, as well. I will always change the names to protect the innocent… and the guilty. We may never come to an indefinite solution, but I promise a valiant effort on my part. Worst case scenario, I will provide a little entertainment, most definitely enhanced if read with a slight to moderate buzz.

About Jimmy Spencer

Jimmy Spencer has extensive experience in journalism and new media. As the founding editor of SacMidtown.com, Spencer combines his writing, reporting and editing skills to produce a "pretty good site about midtown." During the day, Spencer covers government and also covers the NBA. At night, he watches T.V. and plays on the Internet. Every now and then, he walks around his midtown neighborhood. Spencer began his professional journalism career with The Sacramento Bee, finishing his tenure with the McClatchy-owned newspaper in the new media department. Spencer moved to Connecticut where he continued his growth in new media as a writer/content producer for NBC Sports. Spencer also worked in media relations with the Sacramento River Cats, Minor League Baseball Triple-A affiliate of the Oakland A’s. Spencer graduated with a Bachelor of Arts degree in journalism from California State University, Sacramento where he served as Editor-in-Chief of The State Hornet campus newspaper. Spencer was raised in Marin County and currently lives in Sacramento, Calif. Spencer works in the community as a high school basketball coach in the Sacramento area.

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Posted by on Jul 30 2010. Filed under Dating. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

1 Comment for “Dating Nonsense: Tales Of Dating In Midtown”

  1. Zahid

    Your analysis would be improved if you would differentiate between the various “games with a ball.” Basketball or football: 101%. Baseball: 92%. Tennis: 47%.

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